Google says it's 34 degrees outside, Weather.com is going so far as to say it's 39 degrees but feels like 34. The weather page in my paper says it's going to dip down to 10 degrees tonight. Weather.com disagrees, saying it's only going to drop to 16 degrees. The competition down the hall is clocking in with a cheerful 25 degrees in the heights, 18 degrees in the valley. But then Weather.com has to come back with a forecast of scattered snow showers tomorrow, and now all bets are off, because there's a giant high pressure system hanging out over the four corners and when will the madness end?

The dire predictions have me delving into the Hawaii pictures. Like this one.



Funny story about that particular place. To read the National Park brochure, it was considered sacred to the acient Hawaiians; if a person could make it to Hounounou, they'd be forgiven their tresspasses. "Instant karma!" Adam called it.

We visited twice. The first time was phenomenal. We clammored over some lava outcroppings, spotted a couple of sea turtles and gazed out at the ocean. The day before we flew home, we decided to go back. Just as we got into the park, my ankle rolled and and I went skittering across some very unforgiving, very rough sand. Ripped the hell out of my right calf; more than six months later, and there's still a faint scar where I tore away the skin.

That was not my finest moment. My leg was bloody and my ankle hurt and I just broke down and cried. Gawd, how embarrassing. Adam got me to my feet and helped me hobble to the ranger station, where I was given a couple of alcohol wipes and a band aid and told to wear better shoes. I cleaned the wound as best I could, picking out sand and sea shell shards, and washed my face. When I came out, Adam just frowned at me. "Poor poogle," he said. "You must have some serious karma issues."

He parked me on the beach for a little while to calm down and take in the scenery. While I was sitting and whimpering quietly to myself, a sea turtle crawled out of the ocean to sun himself next to me.



This impressed Adam. He decided the karma gods had taken pity on the poor, scraped up me and sent a happy reptile to come and keep me company.

Personally, I think the turtle was just as irritated as I was. Every time he got comfortable on the beach and close his eyes to bask in the sun, the tide would pick up just a bit and roll right over his butt. He'd open his eyes and give me this "Oh, goddamnit," expression before pulling himself up the beach another three inches. The process repeated until he was dead level with me. I could have reached out and patted him, but his mandible was imposing and who wants to be patted by a stranger when they're trying to take a nap? I mean, honestly.

So we sat on the karma-cleansing beach together and wondered just what the hell kind of hoop we were supposed to jump through.