I was going to post about the most excellent synergy of "Talledega Nights" and Juan Pablo's recent move to NASCAR. I was going to post about chile freezers. Instead, you're getting another whining post about not being able to sleep.

This is Insomnia Night #5.

The first night, it was cute. The second night, it was not nearly as cute. The third night was annoying. Last night was cruel bordering on unusual.

And I've tried all the old remedies: cutting caffeine after 6 p.m., reading a half-hour before turning off the light, popping Tylenol PM like popcorn, getting up and coming back to bed (repeatedly), all those things.

Not helping.

Also not helping is the voice in the back of my head convinced that -- in the span of five days -- I've managed to totally rework my internal clock for a 3 a.m. turn in, and maybe it's the fault off the monsoon.

I don't know what the hell's going on. I'm just glad the work week's almost finished, though that same little voice is saying, "Yeah. Just as soon as you reboot into your 'normal' sleeping habits, Monday will roll around and you'll be back to square one, genius."

The little voice in my head gets cranky after eleven.

Sigh. It's a quarter to three and I'm not even weary.

If anyone's got a big bag of elephant tranqs, could you give me a call?